You’ve tried talk therapy. You might have attended a support group. But have you tried hugging a cow?
Ellie Laks, founder of The Gentle Barn–a nonprofit animal sanctuary with a base in Dittmer, Missouri–has a simple mission to help “rescued animals rescue humans right back.” One of the services at The Gentle Barn, Cow Hug Therapy is an extension of that intention and is described as an “alternative therapy for adults and children, many of whom suffer from various forms of PTSD.”
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In an effort to more widely share the mental health benefits of cow hugging, Laks has written a book about the discoveries that emerged out of The Gentle Barn’s practices: Cow Hug Therapy: How the Animals at the Gentle Barn Taught Me about Life, Death, and Everything In Between. Here, Laks talks about the nontraditional therapy method, her new book, and what she hopes will come of the project.
What is Cow Hug Therapy, and how does it help people?
Cow Hug Therapy is an hour-long session at The Gentle Barn where people can rest their faces against our gentle giants, hug our cows, and find a very nurturing, special kind of hope and healing.
Who can benefit from this nontraditional type of therapy?
Cow Hug Therapy is for everyone! Anyone who is stressed, suffering from depression or anxiety, trying to recover from trauma or grief, or anyone who needs a good, unconditionally loving hug.
Have you received any responses that have stood out as especially meaningful to you?
We had a mom who tragically lost her son, and she drove hours to get to us and find her healing in our cows’ embraces. We have had guests who lost spouses to suicide, tragedy, or who have gone through severe trauma… and we’ve had folks who are still working through loss and changes from the pandemic. They can find the nurturing they need with our cows. No matter what someone is going through, after their sessions, we hear time and time again how much it meant, how much it helped, and how the person feels stronger and more helpful afterward.
What initially inspired you to dive into this type of work?
Through the challenges of growing up in my own childhood, it was always animals who were there for me. I had a dream to have a place where I could heal animals and animals could help me heal people. It was my very first cow, Buddha, who wrapped her neck around me and hugged me. I came to rely on those hugs every evening to wash away the stress of the day and make me stronger for the next morning. I knew that there were other people who must need this healing, too, so I established our healing modalities for hurting humans with our cows and other animals, and here we are, hosting sessions for guests every day.
What makes the Cow Hug Therapy approach special?
When we were infants, we rested on our caregivers’ chests, heard their heartbeat, rose and fell with their breathing, and felt vulnerable and safe in our caregivers’ strong protective arms. When we grow up, there is nothing that mimics that feeling. I believe that every animal has something amazing to offer and teach us, but when we hold smaller animals or even ride large horses, we are the dominant one in the relationship. Not with cows. They are much larger than us, and we cannot get them to do something that they don’t want to do. When they take us into the fold of their family, they do it because they are choosing to help heal us, as they know we are hurting. When we rest our faces against Gentle Barn cows, we can hear their heartbeat and slow our own to match theirs. We rise and fall with their breathing. We feel safe and vulnerable and small against a giant protective, nurturing frame, and that is where healing starts.
What was the most rewarding thing about writing this book?
The most rewarding thing about writing my new book, Cow Hug Therapy, was telling the animals’ stories and sharing their wisdom with people. Animals have always been my greatest teachers and healers, and through my new book, I can be their voice, share their lessons, help readers understand how extraordinary animals really are, and make other people’s lives easier.
Can you explain the benefits the animals also receive from this?
Everyone wants to have a purpose and know that they matter. Once our animals heal and recover from their own stories of trauma, most of them choose to do this work. In turn, the animals have a great big purpose, are healing others, and feel good knowing that they matter. Those that don’t want to do healing work do not have to, but the ones who want to do it love it and feel important doing it.
What do you wish people would understand about Cow Hug Therapy and PTSD?
There are many people with PTSD who have a hard time talking about their trauma, so traditional talk therapy doesn’t always work. Cow Hug Therapy at The Gentle Barn works in silence instead of with words. It opens up the right brain for intuition instead of the left cognitive, rational part of the brain. It helps center and ground participants. It helps them connect instead of feeling isolated. It is something that they feel instead of having to do. For people who don’t want to talk about their trauma because they are too angry or shut down, or cannot talk about it because they don’t remember, they can find themselves, healing, strength, and hope in the warm embrace of our cow hug therapists.
What sort of impact do you hope this book makes?
I’m hoping readers will fall in love with animals and understand more about their intelligence, affection, and healing powers. I’m hoping readers will become empowered to protect animals and be kinder to them. I am hoping to help caregivers understand compassion fatigue and how to get through it to continue their caregiving. I’m hoping to share what I have learned from animals about self-care, gratitude, meditation, and surrender to help others find more peace. And I am hoping to help readers see death through the eyes of our animals and help them get from grief to gratitude more easily.
What’s next for The Gentle Barn?
We want to expand to have more locations, save more animals, heal more humans, open more hearts to the miracle of animals, write more books, tell more stories, and learn more from our remarkable rescued animals who have something to offer everyday.
