Author and journalist Katherine Reynolds Lewis first wanted to delve into the subjects of parenting and child behavior as a way to understand her own three children, who are now ages 11, 14, and 25.
“I got interested just from having a perspective of a mom trying to get my home to run smoothly,” she says. “I was a Girl Scout leader and was coaching teams for Odyssey of the Mind. In all these settings, kids just weren’t cooperating the way I remember cooperating when I was a kid.”
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Her debut book, The Good News About Bad Behavior: Why Kids are Less Disciplined Than Ever—And What to Do About It, aims to explore just that. In her research, Reynolds Lewis found that one in two children will develop a mood or behavior disorder by the time they’re 18 years old, and many parents are feeling it’s more difficult to exert discipline over their kids. Her book finds that, in order for kids to learn self-control and self-discipline, “we have to give up control,” she says.
Reynolds Lewis will return to St. Louis this upcoming Monday, May 14, to speak about her work at Left Bank Books, where she’ll be in conversation with St. Louis Post-Dispatch columnist Aisha Sultan. The event is free and begins at 7 p.m.
Before beginning her career as a journalist, Reynolds Lewis studied physics at Harvard University. She later moved to New York City and has published pieces in The Atlantic and Mother Jones. “To me, journalism and physics are both ways of understanding the world around us,” she says, adding, “And physics did help me decode all the scientific research I had to read.”
In writing and researching the book, Reynolds Lewis interviewed hundreds of parents and teachers and pored over hundreds of scientific studies. From that research, she pulled out compelling stories to craft the book’s narrative. “Often, people think [the book] is going to be prescriptive, like, ‘Do this. Don’t do that. Here’s how you’re messing up as a parent,’” she says. “I wanted to tell stories. It’s narrative journalism, where I’m embedded with a family or a classroom or research lab and painting a scene of what’s happening.”
The Good News About Bad Behavior is structured in three parts. Reynolds Lewis first makes the case that children today are less disciplined and now face a crisis of self-regulation. The second part relays solutions. The third part helps parents find ways to stick to those solutions. Ultimately, Reynolds Lewis wants parents take away a hopeful message.
“It’s a very normal part of how kids develop nowadays,” she says. “My big takeaway is that when kids are behaving badly, it’s a sign that something is needed, and it’s a red flag to pay attention to. It’s not a signal that you did something wrong as a parent. So often we blame ourselves. That’s not helpful.”