How do I get a server’s attention without looking obnoxious? —Jason R., St. Louis
Before answering the question, may we suggest how not to do it. Namely, snapping fingers (at any volume of “snap”), yelling (even at ‘I wasn’t yelling‘ volume), waving like an NFL referee signaling for a timeout, whistling (even the subtle bird-call-sounding warbles), or raising an empty glass (as if initiating a misguided toast).
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While we concur that it’s frustrating seeing that one’s server is occupied (or worse, monopolized by a mobile device), there are proper ways to garner attention while in a restaurant:
1. Say “excuse me” in as hushed a volume level will accomplish the task.
2. Try to make eye contact and smile while doing so. A little neck craning and eyebrow raising may be in order.
3. Wave as sheepishly and indiscreetly as possible, not like you’re hailing a cab in Manhattan.
4. Consider the above options with a passing staffer. Unless the request is ridiculous or unreasonable, there will be no repercussions—or stink eyes.
5. Another way to accomplish the task (one that does not disrupt table conversation) is to excuse oneself from the table (a restroom break, maybe) and make the request known.
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