You believe in the power of advertising?
We don’t either.
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Okay, so maybe there are consumers who buy a particular brand of toilet tissue because those cute and cuddly ursines on the commercials blot their bear behinds with it. It seems to us, however, that if you’re buying tissue based upon the antics of cartoon bears, you may have some problems of a deeper and frankly, more disturbing nature than choosing a brand of TP.
We’ve always had the suspicion most advertising is a waste of money. That said, we’re in a local Asian grocery store last week, Asia Market, out in Creve Coeur, searching around for something called, in Japanese, natto. We don’t know what it’s called in English, exactly, and more to the point, we don’t know if there’s a word for it in Korean, which is the language of the people running this particular market, and so we were on our own, poking about.
And we come across a package and the advertising on it…
We looked, and looked again. And wandered off. Then came back and had another look. It was like we couldn’t take our eyes off it. We laughed it off—if you see a white guy in a local Asian grocery store engaging in a gentle yet sardonic laugh, it might well be us—and found the natto. Then, we have to admit, we went back and picked up the package and put it in our cart.
It was a package of Korean pumpkin buns. Which are pretty much what they sound like. Imagine dinner rolls flavored like pumpkin. They’re okay. We would not recommend them as a substitute for dinner rolls, mind you. Unless you have some fairly broadminded guests at the table.
What got us, though, was not the buns. It was that package.
It was dominated by a picture of a teensy little man with an enormous head. And he’s screaming. Maniacally. A scream of primal, Diyonisian joy. He’s got this wide-open mouth—he looks like a guy who’s just been told he will never, ever again have to hear about Kristen Stewart. He’s got on a little chef’s smock and blue blousy pants like chefs wear today and they’ve even gone to the trouble of putting a teeny, tiny chef’s toque on his giant head.
But it was one detail that really got us, really was the clincher in causing us to pick up that package of Korean pumpkin buns and bring them home. And we wondered, all the way there, just what it was that was going through the minds of the owners of the Korean bun company, along with the advertising firm, that came up with this as the commercial artwork for these Korean pumpkin buns.
Seoul Advertising Agency: “Okay, so here’s our idea. We’re asking ourselves: ‘What sells pumpkin buns like a guy with a giant head shilling on the package for them?”
Pumpkin Bun Company: “Well, we’re thinking we could go with oh, say, a picture of one of the pumpkin buns?”
SAA: “You could, sure. Burger King could have gone with commercials that just had pictures of their burgers, couldn’t they? But no. They went with the giant-headed king, didn’t they?”
PBC: “Hey, that’s right, you know.”
SAA: “So do you think it’s just possible a giant-headed guy could do for your pumpkin buns what the King did for Whoppers?”
PBC: “Hmm. You might have a point there.”
SAA: “That’s why you’re paying us fifty kajillion won to come up with these ideas.”
PBC: “Only, the King had that big crown. How do we distinguish our giant-headed guy from all the other spokes-giants out there?”
SAA: “Good question. Get this: on our big-headed guy, we take a Magic Marker and draw a cheesy moustache on him.”
PBC: “Really? Wow. Did you say we’re paying you fifty kajillion won for these ideas? Ms. Kim, get me accounting on the line. We are going to be paying these guys fifty-one kajillion won from now on.”
Which does sound a little ridiculous. But who are we to talk? Who we are, after all, are the ones driving home from Asia Market with a package of Korean pumpkin buns.
Oh, and by the way: that stuff about not believing in advertising. We just want to add that in the case of the advertising that appears in St. Louis Magazine, we totally believe that it is worth every penny the advertisers spend on it and we think you ought to seriously consider whatever products or services they are promoting. Especially if that includes Korean pumpkin buns.
Asia Market 1243 Castillons Arcade Plaza (Olive Blvd. at Fee Fee Road) 314-878-0022
