What do you think of closely spaced banquette tables in restaurants? —Dan C., St. Louis
With Valentine’s Day approaching, this is the perfect love it–or–loathe it question, as there’s rarely any middle ground. That said, there are several ways that naysayers can better adapt to the situation.
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There’s no argument that a long banquette is the most space-efficient way to seat diners, and it’s doubly efficient when several tables are able to be pushed together to accommodate a pesky 10-top. But I take points off when the seating is uncomfortable: A cushioned bench should be mandatory; church pews should remain in churches. (Unrelated but off-putting to some are the other banquette seats, which often face a blank wall. Let’s hear it for large mirrors!)
Most people do not enjoy being confined—for instance, when 20 people jostle, elbow to elbow, in a teeny residential kitchen. So while some diners willingly accept a crammed, bistro-style floor plan (you know, those who don’t mind their conversations being overheard, doing a little eavesdropping themselves, or their server squeezing between tables), those who prefer a little privacy are put off. (I’m reminded of the motherly advice to never mention last names when conversing in restaurants, because you never know who might be seated at the adjacent table.)
If you adore a quaint, tiny bistro but are not as enthusiastic about the tight seating plan, however, there are a few options:
- Arrive either early or late, when the banquette in question may not be so crowded.
- Dine on an off-night, when fewer customers are present.
- Request a table at either end of the banquette as they tend to be quieter and more private. (Tables at akar, Louie, and Wright’s Tavern come to mind.)
- The obvious suggestion: Request a non-banquette table. There’s no way that every table in the place is 12 inches away from the other.
- Make management aware (anonymously or otherwise) that you find the seating arrangement uncomfortable. If and when enough customers voice their displeasure, a table or two will be removed, and civility will be restored.
Asked whether he’s a fan of the arrangement, SLM dining critic Dave Lowry quips: “We like banquette seating because, frankly, we’re lonely and have intimacy issues and the human contact when we’re crammed in like a chip in a Pringles can is the only touch we typically receive in life, and if we could only raise our forkful of boeuf without gouging our neighbor in the ear, it would equate to the perfect dinner.”
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