
Illustration by Britt Spencer
Years ago, around the time my grandchildren first showed me how to use the internet, I stumbled upon a website called DumbLaws.com, which aggregates antiquated and extraneous legislation that states and cities never got around to repealing. For instance, it is illegal in Alaska to view a moose from an airplane. New York forbids its citizens to walk around with ice cream cones in their pockets on Sundays. In Illinois, a person must carry $1 in cash or risk being arrested for vagrancy. In this context, a ban on margarine would seem par for the course.
Now, when it comes to smearing grease on my toast, I’m an old-school fan of animal fat. I’ve never had much trouble believing that I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter isn’t, in fact, butter. But if, in the privacy of your own home, you prefer to top your baked potato with a spread derived from vegetable oil, that’s your prerogative. I’m no libertarian, but this doesn’t seem to necessitate government intervention. And yet, in 1895, Missouri did indeed pass restrictions on imitation butter. Violators faced a $100 fine for a first offense, with a $500 fine and up to six months in prison reserved for repeat violators. By 1902, 32 states had laws regulating the color of margarine.
Why? At the time, the dairy industry wielded great political clout, and protecting the profits of the state’s milk producers was a concern of paramount importance. Preventing margarine makers from dyeing their product yellow would leave the spread with an unappetizing gray color, making it less likely to cut into butter’s market share (a smear campaign, if you will).
Over time, as margarine’s popularity grew and sales eventually outpaced those of butter, these laws fell out of favor. Missouri’s statutes were last amended in 1939, and Sarah Alsager, a spokeswoman for the state’s Department of Agriculture, doesn’t know when they were last enforced. In 2010, as part of a 192-page bill eliminating dozens of expired provisions, Missouri finally repealed its yellow margarine ban. So today, you are free to eat as much margarine as your heart desires. Should you? According to the Mayo Clinic, margarine contains fewer bad saturated fats than butter and more good unsaturated ones. Just be sure to buy a margarine that doesn’t include deadly trans fats, which probably ought to be outlawed.