This is a season of dread and loathing. I’m referring neither to the Lenten fish-fry season, nor this harsh winter that just won’t end. No, I’m talking about tax time. Ready or not, April 15 is right around the corner.
To give you a respite from all those dizzying numbers and forms—enter sum of lines 12 to 18 in line 24, and divide by line 33—we put together this (incomplete) list of notable locals who have run afoul of the IRS. It’s a useful guide on how not to do your taxes.
Sports
Once upon a time, Darryl Strawberry was a rising baseball star, his electric combination of speed and power producing several selections to All-Star Games. But by the mid-’90s, drug abuse had derailed his career. In 1995, he pleaded guilty to tax evasion and was sentenced to six months of home confinement. After a couple of baseball comebacks, further struggles with addiction, and a battle with colon cancer, Strawberry eventually turned his life around and settled in the St. Louis region, becoming a preacher in St. Peters. It’s a feel-good story, but he and his wife, Tracy, were reportedly still coming up a bit short on their taxes. In January, the Missouri Department of Revenue filed a lien in St. Charles County Circuit Court, saying the Strawberrys owed $6,054 in income tax. Less than a year earlier, in March 2013, the state had claimed that the couple owed $8,786.
The Rams recently admitted to charging fans too much sales tax, collecting about an extra 40 cents for a $100 ticket. The team filed an appeal with the state, asking for a refund of about $400,000, even though the Rams did not intend to return the extra money to fans. The organization also asked the state to forgive an additional $445,000 in unpaid taxes. It was the latest in a line of tax spats pitting the Rams against state and local governments.
Dining
The celebrated Central West End restaurant Salt went down in a financial ball of flames, in a prolonged ordeal that lasted from late 2012 until midsummer 2013, when it finally closed. In its bankruptcy petition, Salt listed various tax debts, including $75,436.27 owed to the IRS in withholdings and $35,929.72 to the Missouri Department of Revenue in sales tax.
This year, supporters saved Local Harvest from the brink of financial collapse, responding in droves to an online fundraising campaign, quickly raising $120,000. According to the St. Louis Business Journal, the state has filed at least seven tax liens against Local Harvest since last summer, totaling more than $50,000.
Entertainment
Nelly hasn’t had any major tax problems that we’re aware of, but he did once top the rap charts with his song “Grillz.” That led some to discuss whether he would be justified in deducting his tooth jewelry. The consensus seemed to be that, yes, Nelly could consider his disco-ball-like mouth a business expense, important to the promotion of his personal brand.
Then last year, during the government shutdown, Nelly started a movement to suspend taxes until politicians went back to work. “I’m trying to campaign, since the government ain’t working, we shouldn’t have to pay taxes,” Nelly told VH1. “Because, you know, paying taxes is supposed to pay for the government, which in turn is not working. So if they’re not working, I shouldn’t have to pay taxes. And me being in the upper echelon of the tax bracket, feel that the money I could be saving over these next couple of days could be very vital to my survival… So y’all keep banging.” Nelly made a strong point, especially with that last bit, but the IRS didn’t agree.
Politics
In 2011, Sen. Claire McCaskill, who was running for reelection, got in trouble for her private plane. First, it was reported that she had billed taxpayers for a political trip around Missouri. Further, over the previous four years, she had spent $76,000 from her Senate budget to fund trips on the aircraft. She refunded the Treasury more than $88,000. Then it came out that she owed $287,273 in back state property taxes on the $2.2 million plane. At that point, she announced she would settle up with the state—and then get out of the flying business. “I have convinced my husband to sell the damn plane,” McCaskill said. “I will never set foot on the plane again.” Then her 2012 opponent, Republican Todd Akin, coined the phrase “legitimate rape,” a story that far overshadowed McCaskill’s tax issues.
That same year, in the race for governor, incumbent Jay Nixon alleged in ads that challenger Dave Spence, who ran on a business platform, had been late in paying tens of thousands in taxes over the years. Spence denied the allegations.
Several local politicians—including Antonio French, just this week—have been fined for failing to abide by campaign-finance ethics rules. But that’s a whole different can of worms.
For now, we’ll let you get back to doing your own taxes.