Photograph by Terren Peterson
Ryan "The Riot" Theriot is in a very specific awkward position—it’s that moment when you discover you look exactly like your significant other’s ex, or your girlfriend’s dad. The moment when you realize you’re somebody else’s type. When he finally gets the chance to meet Tony La Russa, he’ll have no choice but to wonder: Am I just another short, white, scrappy piece of meat to this man?
La Russa’s soft spot for men in dirty uniform is old news by now; the Cardinals have, since his arrival in 1996, been the employer of first resort for undersized utility infielders who define adjectives like "scrappy" and "gritty" and inspire new ones, like “hustly” or “playhardy.” Most recently, Aaron Miles scrapped and gritted his way back onto the Cardinals’ roster a year after having the worst offensive season of any player with at least 150 plate appearances. Tony La Russa is a Hall of Fame-bound manager, but he’s also easily swayed by anybody who can plausibly claim to be giving 110 percent.
Normally, the presence of a token playhardy utility infielder at the back of the roster isn’t a problem—every team has its Mike Gallego or Joe McEwing. But this year’s quest for grit threatens to hamstring the team’s defense. Instead of shifting Theriot to second base and displacing fellow scrapper Skip Schumaker, the Cardinals have decided to move forward without their grit-free shortstop, defensive whiz Brendan Ryan.
Given the choice of three poor hitters with wildly divergent defensive skills—Schumaker plays the infield like the converted outfielder he is, even after going native on offense—the Cardinals have chosen the two who look like they’re playing the hardest. It’s one thing to value hustle in the last man on your roster; it’s somewhat less endearing to pick your starters for it.
It’s just a shame that Theriot is caught in the middle. When he’s taking ground balls during spring training, the thought will have to cross his mind: When Tony looks out here, does he see me or Stubby Clapp?
Dan Moore is the the managing editor of SB Nation St. Louis, writer for Cardinals blog Viva El Birdos, and a local freelancer.
