Otis Soliloquy

Neon Memes • Damn. You're onto me, aren't you? Even though I'm slumping, all but collapsing, in the corner of this elevator cage, looking as if I've been mustard-gassed and bayoneted in the monthly trench warfare of producing the area's preeminent magazine, you've discerned the danger I present, despite the three other occupants. In consequence, instead of facing the door, as our fellow passengers and I do, you've positioned yourself perpendicular to me, you clever thing. And in consequence of your position, drat the luck, I can't succumb once more to the "little voices," unspool that handy strand of piano wire and garrote you like a pullet tagged for the evening's chicken 'n' dumplings. Instead, I have to stand here, contemplating your profile. Nice nose. Its prominence ably offsets the sheer and utter absence of a chin. And that mandibular mole? Why, I wouldn't at all fret about its potential development into a melanoma...unless you've been counseled otherwise by the dermatologist to whom your G.P.'s doubtless referred you. And that hairdo, if you can call it that― Whoops! Here's my floor! Gotta go! Ciao! ―Bryan A. Hollerbach, Managing Editor