Photo courtesy of Pam Wilson.
The author, left, finds time to re-charge by cycling with friends.
As a parent and CEO of our household, it’s a rare day that I have nothing to do, to pick-up, to call about, to drop off, or to prepare for the next day. But downtime is vital to re-energizing our minds and spirits. And yet, as parents, we rarely take the time to do anything out of our ordinary routines. Typically, the thinking is, “If I take the time to do something that’s not on my calendar or not on my to-do list, I’ll feel behind and overwhelmed by the next day."
I hate the feeling I get when I walk into the house and notice that the dishwasher hasn’t been emptied, that there are meals to prepare, laundry to complete, the dog who needs to be walked. Then, there are the creative endeavors I enjoy so much, like research and writing.
As time marches on, our needs change and I’ve tried to stay in-tune with those needs. Sometimes a new dance class is the answer. Sometimes it’s a morning of surfing the web or trying a new recipe. To keep life interesting, I try to stay on top of my changing desires.
A few weeks ago, my friend Karen e-mailed to ask if I would like to go on a bike ride with her.
I moved a few things around and invited our friend Jenny to join us. The day of our ride we awoke to rain and drizzle but we rode anyway. It was nice, but nothing out of the ordinary.
Before our second scheduled ride, my to-do list had grown to mountainous proportions and I considered canceling.
And then I thought about how I would feel if I didn’t show.
Instead of taking care of myself and enjoying a day with friends, I would be stuck in my same old rut.
It was a bright and beautiful morning the day we set out on our bike ride. Jenny and I drove to Forest Park and met Karen there. We rode longer and harder than we had in months. It was challenging and fun and we talked and laughed for almost two hours. At lunch, I realized I felt better than I had in a long time.
A day for me turned out to be exactly what I needed. When I returned home, I answered e-mails, emptied the dishwasher, made dinner, packed lunches and negotiated with my teenager.
What re-energizes you? Whatever that is, whatever that looks like, do it today. The energy you put into yourself will filter through to your family. That’s a promise.
For thirteen years, Pam Wilson has written S.O.S. From Suburbia, a monthly column for St. Louis Moms and Dads, which is now part of The St. Louis Post-Dispatch and appears online at stltoday.com. She wrote the “Off the Beaten Path” column for SwimBikeRun St. Louis. Wilson has a Masters in Social Work from Washington University.