Sharpen your pencil and get ready to take some notes. We’ve talked to admissions representatives, parents, and students for tips, timelines, and words of wisdom on selecting a private school in St. Louis. While the process can seem daunting, having fun is still important. Remember: It’s a mutual exploration—just as schools are trying to create a robust student body, you are trying to find the school that is the best fit.
1. Take a deep breath.
If you’re feeling unsure about the process, you’re not alone. When Ann Murphy, director of admissions at St. Louis University High School, began researching schools with her son, she remembers feeling nervous. “I wasn’t certain about what the school was looking for or if my son would be a good fit,” she recalls. “Each school is unique in its mission and formation of students, and there are so many great options in St. Louis.”
If you are overwhelmed at any point in the selection process, reach out to an admissions officer. “We are here to serve,” says Jim Brockman, executive director of enrollment management at Christian Brothers College High School. “At each of the schools, there is someone who is excited to answer your questions.”
2. Start with the student’s needs.
Chris and Kerry Keller, parents of four sons—three of whom attend Chaminade College Preparatory School and one who attends Neuwoehner High School in the Special School District—suggest staying focused on the student’s individual needs. “Rather than starting with a school or a list of schools, start with the kid: What are your child’s strengths, needs, and areas for improvement?” says Kerry. “Identify the tangible and intangible elements to the long-term success of your child, and then start your evaluation solely based on your kid.”
“High school shouldn’t be considered a destination,” adds Chris. “It’s simply a starting line.”
The school that parents attended might not be the best fit for their children. A lot can change in 20-plus years. “Parents may assume that the processes that were in place when they applied to high school are still used today, or that a school is the same as it was when they attended,” says Monica Sullivan, director of admissions at Nerinx Hall. “Operating on assumptions like these may rule out some wonderful options.”
“Look beyond prestige and reputation,” recommends Eric Brunt, director of enrollment management at Mary Institute and Saint Louis Country Day School. “Go into the process with an open mind, ready to evaluate schools and communities that will be the best fit for your child and your family.”
3. Get a jump start.
It’s never too early to start looking. For some families, having extra time helps prepare for tuition costs. You can begin familiarizing yourself with schools through summer camps, sporting events, and other community activities hosted by schools.
“There are summer camps and programs for students as young as third grade,” says Calvin Stewart III, who will be attending SLUH in the fall. “While a summer camp won’t give you an academic overview of an institution, it will show the communication style and general atmosphere of the school. I think having a student gain familiarity with the physical campus is valuable as well.” A more formal search process should begin in the early years of middle school.
4. Do your homework.
There are so many options, it’s probably best to begin your search online. Many schools have a robust online presence, with data about admissions and academics, extracurricular activities, the school’s history and philosophy, and much more. After researching the options, create a list of the schools you’d like to visit.
5. Once you narrow the list, experience the schools.
Most institutions provide many opportunities for interested families to visit campus. During shadow days, for instance, a prospective student can spend a day on campus. “The shadow day visit is the most crucial,” says Jane Roth, director of academics at Thomas Jefferson School. “That’s when a kid is going to walk away saying, ‘I found my people. I can see myself here.’”
Attend as many events as you need to make an informed decision, but keep in mind that you don’t have to attend every one. “I notice families will sometimes sign up for every admissions event, perhaps thinking that this helps students to be admitted,” says Murphy. “Of course, we want to meet you, but these events are really optional and designed to provide the maximum look if you’re needing more information to make your decision. They are scattered throughout the fall, so you have plenty of time to attend one or more. Don’t feel like you have to attend everything. It does not affect our decision to admit a student.”
6. Talk to other families.
While school-sponsored events are a great way to learn more, don’t underestimate the value of talking to present students and parents. “They will have the most current views on the school, the quality and value of education, the culture, and the expectations,” says Brunt. “You may also want to check out a school’s social media channels, as you can see glimpses of everyday student life from afar.”
7. Consider the key variables.
There are many factors to consider when selecting a school. Academics are at the crux of high school, so you want to make sure the school offers the elective options and the support your kid needs. “Your child’s education happens in the classroom, so focus on the teachers, curriculum, and classmates who make up the educational environment at school,” says Amanda Cashen, a parent of a student at Thomas Jefferson School.
Most schools offer rigorous academics, so sometimes the decision simply comes down to a gut feeling: What school feels right? “Every kid is different, with different interests, abilities, and needs,” says Brockman. “Every school is different, with different missions and opportunities. Most kids will find a couple schools that are a great fit. But then they have to decide which is the place where they feel like they belong.”
Extracurricular activities can also play an integral role. Be sure the schools you’re considering offer opportunities beyond the classroom that will interest your student. If a club doesn’t exist, ask how to start one.
Tuition costs are also important. Inquire about financial aid packages. Do not eliminate a school based solely on its initial sticker price; many institutions offer significant financial assistance.
8. When applying, emphasize more than test scores.
While high schools are interested in academic achievements, other criteria matter, too. Nerinx Hall High School, for instance, takes a holistic approach to admissions: Academics are important, but the school recognizes that one student may look at excellence differently than another.
SLUH looks at sixth-, seventh-, and eighth-grade report cards and standardized test scores, but the school also considers a student’s demonstrated co-curricular involvement and the desire to be a lifelong learner. MICDS is interested in how students align with their mission: The school wants students who think critically, embrace all people with compassion, and lead lives of purpose and service.
9. Be honest with each other while finalizing a decision.
It’s important to maintain open communication with your student as you begin to narrow your search. “Use this as a great opportunity to open a dialogue about [your student’s] interests and future goals,” says Rega Wesley-Stewart, a parent of a SLUH student. “Listening can not only help your relationship grow but also give you a better idea of what your child may need in school.”
“Your child’s opinions count for a lot,” says Cashen. “They know their interests. If they are drawn to a particular school environment, then listen to their preferences.”
10. Set yourself up for success.
You have chosen a school and been accepted. Congratulations!
But now what?
“Get involved, get involved, get involved,” says Kerry Keller. In addition to orientations and events for incoming students, social media offers another platform for students and parents to connect. There are also opportunities for families to begin engaging in the school community.
“If you don’t know how to get involved, just ask. There are so many ways to get involved,” says Chris Keller. “The more you get involved, the better you are making the school. And the better the school, the more it can offer your child.”
