As told to Jeannette Batz Cooperman
Photograph by Mark Gilliland
By now, the story is legend. In the mid-’70s, Marylen Mann, an expert in curriculum development, toured a St. Louis senior center. She watched people paste Easter baskets on placemats, listened to them sigh about ailments and absent family. She left blazing with determination and, in 1982, co-founded Oasis with Margie May. Now in 26 cities, it is a national model, integrating education, health, social engagement and community service in ways that are sophisticated, lively and stigma-free. Every year, Oasis brings about 360,000 Americans back to life.
Even when I was young, I always felt sorry for people who were left out. It hurt me.
What we forget, what I am continually reminded of, is how many people in this world are totally alone.
Everything in life is more difficult if you are not surrounded by people who will listen and care.
You need somebody who’s willing to tell you to pull up your socks.
When I was a girl, I was told, “It’s good that you’re smart, because you are not a beauty.”
You can’t have a totally youth-oriented culture when most of the people aren’t young.
Maybe death doesn’t scare me because I don’t dwell on it. I’m much too busy with life.
The terrible thing that happens when you get old is that people start to discount you—and the more you pull away from life, the more they do discount you.
When you age, your circle shrinks, your abilities are limited. Unless you’re someone who all your life has been involved in things outside yourself ... you turn inward.
Illness? You can’t let it define you.
If there is nothing else in your life, every ache and pain becomes all-consuming.
Our culture’s not changing fast enough. We are not ready for what’s coming.
I’m a real chicken about things like skiing or skydiving—but I’m very brave about thinking up new ideas.
People who feel they are powerful bother me.
I’m also bothered by people who think there is only one path to glory, and they’re on it.
The current climate scares me—the religious intolerance and hatred. But religious intolerance has always been a problem for me.
Women share their feelings. I think that is why we age better.
I don’t think men are as nitpicky or as guilt-ridden. Women get hung up in minutiae.
What do you need in a husband? Someone who thinks you are wonderful. And has a sense of humor.
I don’t ever want to do things for appearances’ sake.
I’ve never understood how someone could rely completely on an interior designer or party planner or fashion consultant. It’s as if your ideas aren’t good enough. Good enough for whom?
I’ve decided it’s more important how you act than how you look. But I keep waiting to get old enough that I don’t care.
At 20, you are still trying to figure out who you are. At 70, you don’t have that pressure. You can be yourself.
At 70, you have time. Sometimes that terrifies people; they don’t know how to fill the time; they don’t know what interests them.
To age successfully, you have to be a risk-taker.
