Illustration by Danny Elchert

Post-Dispatch political reporter Jake Wagman floated the notion last June: If Hillary Clinton nabbed both the Democratic nod for the presidency and the office itself, might she name Francis G. Slay to her Cabinet? Wagman made that speculation after the mayor declared his support for the senator — "She values what I value," Hizzoner cooed in a release — and sparked a game of "What if?" about which post Clinton, with her usual perspicacity, might bestow on Slay were she to win the White House. Herewith, four possibilities.


Secretary of Education
Who better to shepherd the DOE than one of the main sponsors of the "special" board now guiding St. Louis Public Schools? As a bonus, the board's formation ultimately prompted the resignation of that pesky Superintendent Diana Bourisaw, who had nearly nothing to recommend her — except a Ph.D. in educational administration and experience at the Missouri Department of Elementary and Secondary Education overseeing accreditation reviews statewide.

Secretary of Housing and Urban Development
"The city has enjoyed a building boom," crows Slay's bio on the municipal website, so heading HUD would seem natural. True, Ballpark Village won't shine at the 2009 All-Star Game, but hey, these things happen. Hizzoner can still congratulate himself on Loughborough Commons. (The 11th Ward homes taken by eminent domain for the sake of that retail strip? Well, ya can't make an omelet ...)

Secretary of Labor
Even though he preened for Esquire last summer in a Domenico Vacca suit valued at $4,900 — more than a third of a year's pay for a St. Louisan working full time at minimum wage — Slay retains the common touch, reflecting his lifelong residency on the predominantly blue-collar South Side. At Labor, he'd likely do a boffo job managing situations involving (say) freedom from employment discrimination.

Attorney General
Of the "big four" Cabinet posts, the Department of Justice would perhaps best suit Slay. Besides having a poli-sci background, he earned a legal degree from Saint Louis University and practiced law for two decades at Guilfoil Petzall & Shoemake. In that respect, Slay could ably follow in the footsteps of fellow Missourian John Ashcroft, who fronted Justice from 2001 to 2005. Of course, unlike Ashcroft, Hizzoner has never lost an election to a stiff. At least not yet.